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Do Guys Cuddle With Just ANY Girl!? (ANSWER)

My friend Sarah is always asking me questions like this… Questions that reveal what a person is truly trying to do or what they’re really thinking. When she asked me a question about getting intimate and about cuddling, I thought it was really pertinent to my readers here. She said, “Hey Ryan, so if a guy cuddles with you—what does that mean? Do guys cuddle with just any girl or does it mean that I’m special?”

Here’s the reality—people feel and share their love with each other in different ways. Thanks to the concept of love languages, we’ve learned that people can ‘feel’ and ‘express’ love in multiple ways. It’s not the same for each of us.

Meaning, one person might be feeling an exceptional amount of love from you wanting to cuddle. And another person might be more interested in hearing that they’re beautiful and that they’re special to you (more auditory than anything else).

Do guys cuddle with just any girl!? The answer is: NO! They don't, usually!
Do guys cuddle with just any girl!? The answer is: NO! They don’t, usually!

Do Guys Cuddle With Just Any Girl? (ANSWER)!

Here’s the thing—it’s pretty rare for a guy to want to cuddle with a girl that they consider to be ‘just friends.’ Usually, this would be kind of awkward anyway. For example, consider if this person would cuddle with one of their guy friends… It’s highly unlikely.

The length of time that a guy cuddles with you may be the core determining factor in how they feel. If they’re cuddling with you for a very short period of time, this could mean that they feel somewhat uncomfortable with the act and that could indicate something else is happening.

And if a guy cuddles with you, that means he’s emotionally and physically interested in you. If he cuddles with you for more than 10-minutes, then you can be absolutely sure that he’s feeling something more romantic with you than you might think.

See also: Signs your boyfriend is losing interest

Types of Cuddle Positions and What They Could Mean

There are many ways to cuddle someone. The type of cuddle position could also indicate what the other person is thinking/feeling about you!

See also: Signs he likes you but is playing it cool


The spooning position is the classic one. It’s where two people are pointing the same direction with their front’s facing the same direction. This position is the most romantic one.


A face-to-face cuddle can happen when two people are laying on a couch or in a bed and happen to be interconnected in some way (think your legs being twisted together). This is also a romantic position as the two of you are very close together.

The Lap Pillow

In the lap pillow position—one person is using the other person’s lap as a type of head rest. This is still romantic but certainly not as romantic as some of the other positions.

Bear Hug

A bear hug is exactly how it sounds. It’s when the two people are facing each other with a complete and engulfed hug. This is a highly romantic position, as well.


Lastly, the back-to-back (or butt-to-butt) cuddle position is one that isn’t as romantic and intimate as some of the others. In this position, the body language is actually indicating that the other person would like to ‘point away’ from the other.

This position is often performed when one person is upset with the other!

Look to the position and the length of time to get a better idea of what's happening between you and him.
Look to the position and the length of time to get a better idea of what’s happening between you and him.

Conclusion—Do Guys Cuddle With Just Any Girl?

Here’s my own experience… I would never get this intimate with someone that I didn’t want to feel special. That’s the whole point of getting close to someone and getting near their body. Is to make them feel special.

Unless something was seriously wrong with me (like I was a narcissist), then I wouldn’t be doing it with anyone who I DIDN’T want to feel that way. Or else how are they truly going to know?

There were some circumstances in life for me where the girl wanted to cuddle and I didn’t… That’s another situation, though. That’s a situation where we didn’t necessarily see eye-to-eye about what was happening in the friendship. Which gets back to age old question of, “Can guys and girls be ‘just friends?’

Common FAQs—Do Guys Cuddle With Just Any Girl?

Common questions and answers about romantic life.

Do guys cuddle with girls they think are ‘just friends?’

It’s highly unlikely that a guy is going to cuddle with you if he considers you to be friends. If he’s throwing you into the friend zone, there’s really nothing that would lead up to the opportunity to get into a cuddle position, anyway!

If you have a guy friend who is trying to cuddle with you and considers you ‘just friends,’ this might be a sign of something else that’s going on with that person. For example, some degree of insecurity that you’ll probably never be able to overcome. It could be a very strong red flag and one that you should avoid!

Will cuddling help a guy to fall in love with you?

It certainly can help. It can depend on the type of person they are what they feel. For most men, though, physical intimacy is going to go a long way. And it doesn’t have to be highly intimate. Just knowing that you appreciate them and want them near you is really going to help to amplify whatever romantic feelings they’re already having.

If you’re not sure whether it’s going to help them to fall in love with you—fall onto the side of ‘yes, it will.’

Can a guy cuddle with you just to pretend to like you or love you?

Some men certainly can. In this case, it might be a guy or a ‘player’ who is trying to get intimate with you and then cuddles with you for a very short period of time. This would be someone who doesn’t want to make you feel ‘used’ for an act that they’re hoping goes down! Wink wink 😉

Watch out for someone who might be a compulsive liar or someone who lies by omission often. This would be a type of person who might be more willing to hurt your feelings in the long-run.

What are the differences between romantic cuddling and friendship cuddling?

The main differences are the length of time and the core position. For example, a face-to-face cuddle that only lasts 5-minutes would indicate that the person or guy you’re cuddling with is really feeling more uncomfortable with the idea then they are interested in the idea.

Use both time, frequency, how the person’s body language is during cuddling, and what the length of time is [of the cuddle] to get a better sense of what’s happening.

Fact checked:
Board reviewed by Marianne Tomlinson, LCSW (Couples and Family Therapy). Content is rigorously reviewed by a team of qualified and experienced fact checkers. Learn more.

About the author

Ryan Sanderson (LCSW) Ryan is a game and relationship enthusiast who enjoys all things quizzes, games, fun, love, relationships, and family. He's a licensed social worker and helps families, couples, and children in need. He's spoken about love and relationships on Salon.com, Forbes, and Mirror, to name a few.

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