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How to Treat a Girlfriend Right

My friend asked me the other night, “Ryan, do you know how to treat a girlfriend ‘right?'” Like, I knew what he was asking. And I think I do… Well, I had to think about it for at least a few minutes. But when I did, I thought to myself, and I can come up with a list of what I do! So here it is!

When you put things into perspective, it’s easier to get a girlfriend than it is to treat them right. Anyone can get a girlfriend, but it takes dedication and commitment to your girlfriend to treat them right and have a lasting and loving relationship.

People say that women are so mysterious and complicated to read, but maybe you’re just finding it hard to pick up on all the subtle cues which will make your life much easier. Women, like men, are human beings at the core of everything, so they are not as complicated as you might think.

How to treat a girlfriend right: Make her your priority—plain and simple!
How to treat a girlfriend right: Make her your priority—plain and simple!

My experience with treating a girlfriend right…

Honestly, my biggest challenge is that I spoiled my girlfriends too quickly. By doing that, they often got too “accustomed” to behaviors that could be one-sided. It’s really important to be able to set healthy boundaries with someone early on.

So while I never really had a problem with learning HOW to treat someone right… I had more of a problem with responding to them when they DIDN’T!

The reality is that no one tells you what is ‘right’…

No one teaches you how to be the best partner for your girlfriend. Somehow you are just expected to know and learn about being the perfect partner through your experiences. However, it is rare to find relationships where both parties are happy and satisfied with the other without a single issue.

And yes, we agree that relationships are not meant to be perfect. Especially with the advent of social media, there has been an over-glorification of romantic relationships in front of the camera. Many people have set unrealistic expectations from their real-life relationships.

The sad part is that people don’t realize it’s all for the camera. We never know what their real lives are like behind the scenes. This is why we cannot take everything at face value.

That said, I recognize that many people do want to know “what it means” to treat a girl correctly… So let’s jump into that.

So what does it mean to treat your girlfriend right?

From idolizing these couples on camera, you might be influenced into thinking that treating your girlfriend right means buying her expensive bags or taking her on exotic vacations, but that’s not all there is. Most people will agree that the little things matter the most to them. There’s more to life than just worldly things.

The “perfect relationship” is a very subjective matter. What sounds right about one couple might not sit right with another, and so on. So what the two people in the relationship consider “right” between them matters. However, regardless of your beliefs about relationships, certain unwritten rules apply to everyone. For example, treating people with respect, being polite, and showing kindness are all part of being human.

So in simple words and in short, you can say that the answer to treating your girlfriend right can be boiled down to loving her genuinely, showing empathy, treating her with kindness, and being respectful towards her.

Just be aware of her presence, her aura, and her being.
How to treat a girlfriend right: Just be aware of her presence, her aura, and her being.

Some Tips On How You Can Treat Your Girlfriend Right

—How to treat a girlfriend right

Be Respectful Towards Her

Many people think being respectful towards your woman is being submissive, but that’s hardly the case. If anything, your being respectful towards your woman shows what a great partner you are. It means that you care and love her so much that you recognize her actions and thoughts.

By showing respect, you are telling her that you value her feelings. This can boil down to politely talking to her and not disregarding her opinions. It can also show up in supporting her when she needs you.

Prioritize Her

Giving her your time is the easiest and best way to treat your girlfriend right. Time is the most valuable of all gifts in the world. You could be loaded with money and buy her expensive gifts daily, but you will not build a strong relationship without spending time together.

Make an effort to show up on time, give her your undivided attention when you’re together and stop making those excuses. They say that everyone has the time to do anything they want. It’s just a matter of priority. And that’s the absolute truth. The better you prioritize your time, the better you can treat your girlfriend right.

Be Her Pillar Of Support

It’s easy to stand by someone when you are both on good terms but harder to do when going through hard times. No matter the situation, try to be her support system. It’s when the times get rough that she needs you the most. So remember that whenever you face trying times, be there for her physically and emotionally.

Try To Practice A Little Bit Of Patience

Sometimes you might have to be a little more patient with her. We are all humans, and we make mistakes, and we have our imperfections. Perhaps these shortcomings might get on your nerves or annoy you sometimes, but instead of getting upset, be patient and clearly communicate your feelings with her.

You can only be the person you are today. Don't try to change or be 'different'
You can only be the person you are today. Don’t try to change or be ‘different’

Remind Her How Much You Love And Care For Her

Perhaps in every relationship, both partners say I LOVE YOU to each other. While these words may carry a lot of meaning, sometimes, going the extra mile and telling your girlfriend how much you love her and care about her in different ways will make her see the depth of the meaning behind your I LOVE YOUs.

Be Faithful

This must come as a no-brainer, but being faithful is the bare minimum you must do as a partner to your lover. Loyalty should not have to be asked for, nor should it be earned. When you decide to be in a committed relationship with her, you are responsible for making her the only woman in your eyes. This goes both ways.

However, it does not mean you cannot meet or have friends outside of your relationship. It only means that any flirtation or the slightest hint of romance with another person should not even cross your mind as long as you are with her.

How to treat a girlfriend right: Always be yourself. If you put up a "show," it'll never last!
How to treat a girlfriend right: Always be yourself. If you put up a “show,” it’ll never last!

Take Care Of Her When She’s Unwell

You only want someone to care for you whenever you’re not feeling your best. Likewise, your girlfriend will love it if you care for her when she is not well. She might have her monthly periods and suffer from terrible cramps, or she’s down with a cold and fever. Maybe it’s just a headache.

Whatever the situation, it will feel good to show her that you’re there to care for her when she needs anything. You don’t have to be a pro at home remedies, but just asking her if she needs anything or giving her a massage is enough to make her feel loved.

Related: Long goodnight messages for her

Listen To Her

Be there to listen to her every need and qualms when you can. Sometimes your girlfriend just needs someone who will listen to her and lend a listening ear. You don’t have to give her solutions or weigh in on your opinions. What counts is that you are offering her your time to listen to what she has to say, which means the most to her.

Remember The Important Dates

Important dates don’t only have to be your anniversaries. It can be her birthday or the birthday of her sibling, parents, or even her pets. It can also have to do with difficult memories like the death anniversary of a loved one. She might be particularly sad or stressed during such days, so it will help to remember such dates and try to be as considerate as you can.

Respect Her Opinions

As is typical in relationships, sometimes, you might have arguments and quarrels because of differences in your opinions. Be mature enough to respect each others’ opinions and try to see the situation from both perspectives. Allow her the freedom to think her thoughts just as you would and have a discussion instead of a debate.

How to treat a girlfriend: Whenever you respond, she should respond... Remember that!
How to treat a girlfriend: Whenever you respond, she should respond… Remember that!

Be The One She Can Rely On

For many people, their partners in relationships are people they can lean on during their time of need. No matter what it is, their significant other is almost always the person they run to for support and help.

If you make excuses almost always when she asks you what she needs from you, she’s probably not your top priority, making you an unreliable partner.

Related: Paragraphs to make your girlfriend cry

Leave Little Notes For Her

It might sound a bit old school, but every girl loves receiving handwritten notes. And it doesn’t have to be a 10-page-long essay about why you love her and what you love about her. It can be just as simple as an I LOVE YOU or your SMILE. It’s enough to make her feel special.

You can even write inside jokes or a fun memory to help personalize the note. Little gestures like these will make her feel the butterflies you both did when you first met or started dating each other. Who doesn’t want to feel that?

Expert advice: Learn what ‘love languages’ are. They are a helpful framework for learning HOW she likes to be shown love (everyone feels love in different ways!).

Stand Up For Her Even When She’s Not Around

Chivalry is not dead! Sometimes the best gestures are those she doesn’t know about or hear directly from you. When you’re out with your friends or family who might have a difference in opinion, stand up for her and let them see her perspective.

You don’t have to agree with her beliefs or ideas but don’t allow someone to trample all over her if you’re in that situation. It doesn’t hurt to let other people know your feelings about her.

Show Her That You Care About Her Wishes

Whenever she asks you for something, as long as it is well within your capabilities and is reasonable, try to fulfill them. If you think her requests are a little questionable, it’s okay to ask her why or what she means in the most respectful manner instead of just dismissing it or calling her weird.

See also: Romantic things to say to your girlfriend

Give Her a Kiss Her On The Forehead

All women love receiving kisses on the forehead. While it might not sound as romantic to some people, many women tend to find this gesture as a comforting and caring way to show that you adore her. It also makes her feel a level of comfort that lip kisses might not bring to the table.

Expert advice: When it comes to intimacy, there is no doubt—men and women feel it very differently. Learn how SHE feels it. Then do more of that.

Be Affectionate

There’s nothing more comforting than coming home after a long day of work and getting a kiss on the forehead or a long hug.

Give Her Space When She Needs It

Contrary to popular belief, sometimes giving her the space she needs is all you must do to show her that you love and respect her. It’s not about breaking up and patching up or getting tired of each other, but sometimes she might want to spend some alone time or deal with some things independently.

Remember that you have individual lives outside the relationship, and you shouldn’t make your whole identity and existence about only the relationship. This can go both ways- respect and trust each other enough to give a little space when needed.

Remember The Little Details

Women love it when their partners remember tiny details, such as how she wore her hair the first time or something she said that has stuck with them. Anything that might have been insignificant at the moment, but you remember it and remind her about it, is a great way to show her affection.

See also: Compliments for women

Make Her Feel Safe Around You

Being open about how much you care for her and telling her that you want to protect her makes her feel safe. Your girlfriend shouldn’t have to walk around eggshells with you. She should feel like she can come to you no matter the situation and know that you will be there to support her.

Again, reassure her that you are there to love, care and support her all the time so she feels like your arms are the safest place on earth.

Expert advice: It’s critical that she continues to feel attracted to you. This means that you are continuing to show your alpha behavior even when things are “rough.”

Ask Her About Her Day

Sometimes you don’t need to do much other than engage in conversation and ask her about her day. It makes her feel wanted and heard. Paying attention to tiny details like these automatically makes your partner realize that someone in her life is interested to know everything about them, which is a special feeling.

Shower Her With Compliments

Everybody loves receiving compliments, be it from their partners or strangers, but it is much more impactful coming from your partner. We don’t mean just complimenting her for her clothes or looks but also for her intelligence, wit, personality, how she handles certain situations or even her sense of humor.

These are all aspects that make her who she is, and complimenting her means that you are aware of the details, even taking the time to notice and appreciate them. This will make her feel seen, heard, and so loved.

See also: Emotional love messages for her

Plan Little Surprises

It’s good to have a little spontaneity in any kind of relationship. You might think of yourself as an unromantic person or someone who is not good with grand gestures, but effort and thoughts always count.

If you’re in a relationship with someone you love and that feeling is reciprocated, you don’t have to worry about what the other person might feel or think. You already know they will appreciate all the things you do for them.

Fact checked:
Board reviewed by Marianne Tomlinson, LCSW (Couples and Family Therapy). Content is rigorously reviewed by a team of qualified and experienced fact checkers. Learn more.

About the author

Ryan Sanderson (LCSW) Ryan is a game and relationship enthusiast who enjoys all things quizzes, games, fun, love, relationships, and family. He's a licensed social worker and helps families, couples, and children in need. He's spoken about love and relationships on Salon.com, Forbes, and Mirror, to name a few.

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