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50 STRONG Signs Your Husband Doesn’t Value You

My close friend Erin asked me, “Ryan, what are signs your husband does not value you?” Well, I thought I should address this—since there’s really no reason that you would want to stick with someone who doesn’t value you!

Finding the love of your life is an enchanting experience, and it becomes even more magical when you decide to marry each other. What could be more perfect than a union of soulmates? But real-life relationships are not written as fairytales, so you can’t always expect a perfect life even though you’ve met ‘the one.’

There is every chance the relationship can go sour if you or your partner decide to stop putting in to make it work! When that happens, some relationships experience imbalances, where one partner may not fully appreciate or value the other.

According to Forbes Advisor, 75% of couples separate due to a lack of commitment. Feeling undervalued or unappreciated in a marriage can be emotionally painful and distressing. While every relationship is unique, some common signs may indicate your husband does not value you as he should.

Related: Signs your husband hates you

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Here Are 50 Signs Your Husband Doesn’t Value You

—Signs your husband doesn’t value you!

Taking You for Granted

Your efforts and contributions are not acknowledged or appreciated.

Belittling Your Achievements

He downplays your accomplishments, making you feel insignificant.

Lack of Trust

He is overly suspicious or distrustful of you without valid reasons.

Controlling Behavior

Your husband exhibits controlling tendencies, limiting your autonomy.

See also: Signs of a disrespectful husband

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Excessive Jealousy

He displays unwarranted jealousy, leading to unnecessary conflicts.

Double Standards

He holds you to higher standards than he holds himself.

Avoiding Conflict Resolution

He refuses to address issues or engage in open communication during conflicts.

See also: Why does my husband yell at me?

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Emotional Withdrawal

He emotionally withdraws or shuts down during discussions.


There are signs of emotional or physical affairs in the relationship.

Isolation from Loved Ones

He discourages or prevents you from spending time with family and friends.


He manipulates facts or reality to make you doubt your perceptions.

Disregarding Your Boundaries

He consistently ignores your personal boundaries.

Breaking Promises

He repeatedly breaks promises or commitments to you.

No Effort in Relationship

He doesn’t put effort into maintaining the relationship.

Comparisons to Others

He frequently compares you negatively to others.

Dismissing Your Hobbies

He belittles or ignores your hobbies and interests.

Financial Neglect

He makes significant financial decisions without consulting you.

Public Humiliation

He embarrasses or humiliates you in front of others.

Indifference to Your Health

He shows little concern for your physical or mental well-being.

Refusing to Apologize

He never apologizes or takes responsibility for his mistakes.

Lack of Emotional Support

He fails to provide emotional support during difficult times.

Dismissing Your Intelligence

He undermines your intelligence and opinions.

Non-Reciprocal Effort

He doesn’t reciprocate the effort you put into the relationship.

Refusing to Attend Social Events

He avoids attending social events or gatherings with you.

Emotional Manipulation

He uses emotional manipulation to control or guilt-trip you.

No Shared Future Plans

He doesn’t include you in future plans or goals.

Lack of Communication

He no longer has meaningful conversations with you.

Disregarding Your Opinions

He is consistently dismissing your opinions and decisions.

Absence of Support

You will feel unsupported in your pursuits and dreams.

Constant Criticism

You feel constantly criticized and belittled by him.

Emotional Neglect

He ignores your feelings or is indifferent to your emotional needs.

Prioritizing Others

Your husband consistently puts others before you.

Ignoring Special Occasions

He keeps forgetting or disregarding essential dates and events.

Refusing to Compromise

He refuses to compromise in the relationship.

Breaking Promises

He frequently breaks promises.

Not Acknowledging Your Efforts

Your efforts and hard work go unnoticed and unappreciated.

Withholding Affection

There is a lack of physical and emotional intimacy.

Dismissing Your Feelings

Your husband regularly dismisses your feelings or reacts negatively when you express them.

Lack of Interest in Your Life

Your spouse shows little interest in your life and experiences.

Criticizing Your Appearance

He constantly criticizes your appearance, which erodes your self-esteem.

Secretive Behavior

He starts keeping secrets from you or is dishonest.

Undermining Your Confidence

Your husband does not value your strengths and capabilities.

Disrespecting Your Privacy

He invades your privacy without your consent.

Reacting Negatively to Your Independence

He responds negatively when you assert your independence.


Your husband consistently prioritizes his needs and desires over yours.

Making Decisions Without Consulting You

He makes major decisions without considering your input.

Disrespectful Remarks

He makes rude jokes or comments at your expense.

No Quality Time Together

He doesn’t prioritize spending quality time with you.

Lack of Gratitude

He rarely expresses gratitude for your efforts and sacrifices.

Criticizing Your Parenting

He criticizes your parenting style or choices.

Final thoughts

If you notice any of the above signs and are worried that your relationship may be approaching a stalemate, it is time to have an open and honest conversation with your husband.

Taking the time to converse and express what you think to each other is the first step in addressing potential issues and restoring the balance in your relationship.

You can also seek the help of a professional counselor who can assist with navigating the many challenges present in your relationship and provide valuable feedback.


Fact checked:
Board reviewed by Marianne Tomlinson, LCSW (Couples and Family Therapy). Content is rigorously reviewed by a team of qualified and experienced fact checkers. Learn more.

About the author

Ryan Sanderson (LCSW) Ryan is a game and relationship enthusiast who enjoys all things quizzes, games, fun, love, relationships, and family. He's a licensed social worker and helps families, couples, and children in need. He's spoken about love and relationships on Salon.com, Forbes, and Mirror, to name a few.

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